Monthly Archives: March 2017

Its Time to Be on Your Way!

“You’re off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting! So, get on your way!  Dr Seuss

“It’s Ok for you, life is better for you. I’ve got….. There isn’t enough time to ……… I haven’t got enough money for …..” the excuses go on. The blaming goes on. As soon as we come up with excuses or blame other people and circumstances, we are accepting the outlook of a victim. Although we may argue about this and not believe it, Carolyn Myss, the author of many number 1 best sellers, states that we all may go through a phase of victimhood every day. Until we recognise that we are that, owning the shadow side of ourselves, we can’t fully embrace what we consider to be the lighter sides to our persona.

Only when we accept that we are the only ones responsible for our life, can we let go of the blaming and excuses. If you pick up a book about the research around the effects of our thoughts and beliefs, or if you watch people on things like TED talks who have done the research, you can’t help but notice that the world is no longer considered flat. It doesn’t matter whether your thoughts and beliefs are negative or positive, the Law of Attraction works with whatever it is given. Just like the Law of Gravity takes things to the ground whatever they are. So what is stopping you getting off to great places and climbing that mountain waiting ahead of you? It’s time to get on your way!

Enjoy climbing the mountain!

Fear and Stress or Trust and Insight, Which is it to Be?

“A head full of fears has no space for dreams.”

The part of our brain that sits above our eyes is called the pre-frontal cortex & this is where the trust, wisdom & insight live. This area of the brain sets us apart from animals as this is where we are conscious & show our intellect. Fear & distrust networks originate in the amygdala in the lower part of the brain. Fear is one of the emotions that elicits the stress response. Cortisol is the hormone or neuro-chemistry, that is released, & it closes down the brain, especially the prefrontal cortex so we become unable to think clearly, or to think & feel about our future. I have been doing some training about a subject called “Conversational Intelligence.” Judith Glaser wrote the book of the same name & it is fascinating to hear the research they have done about how the brain reacts under pressure or stress.

We can feel stress or threatened by our interaction with others within .07 sec. this can be to things like the tone of their voice, if we feel someone is being judgemental ; if we feel that what they are saying is hurting us in some way, or making us feel bad; if we feel like we are taking a risk, we’re scared or feel that we’re going to be rejected; if we feel excluded; if we feel that someone is angry at us; if they’re minimising our power; or make us feel that they are much more important than us. The part of our brain that helps to protect us gets activated and we close down. Think of some environments where you are aware that you are being affected by any of these threats and you know that your brain doesn’t function as well as it could. If you want to make good conscious decisions and dream about your future in a clear way, then you will need to take some strategic actions to keep yourself safe from others harmful ways. When you are feeling safe the prefrontal cortex releases oxytocin – the hugging hormone, dopamine and serotonin, the feel-good hormones.

Enjoy making decisions from your pre-frontal cortex!

Intention plus Action!

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

So we’re back to choice again. I’ve just been doing work with my 5th chakra. This is considered by some to be about choice and intention. The 5th chakra is also called the throat chakra and about having the courage to speak our truth. We all have challenges in life but by setting our intention through the 5th chakra and choosing what you want in a powerful way you open yourself up to become the person you decide to be. Through our speaking we communicate who we are to the minds of other people. We are seen, heard and understood.

But before we speak our intentions out into the world, what are we saying to ourselves? Do we put out an intention into the universe and then counteract that with the inner talk that supports the opposite. Write down, what is it that you are saying to yourself that really is negative, not empowering and actually a lie about yourself? “That’s okay, I don’t mind. I can do it.” It can take courage to actually speak our truth, to say yes when we mean yes and no when we mean no. That we’re choosing what we want in that moment. In that moment we are choosing with courage when we say, “I’m going to live with the consequences but this is what I really want.” Be honest about what you are saying to yourself then think, “So what do I really want? Who do I want to be?” Write down the statement, “Even though I’m terrified of …..(failure?), it’s my intention to………”

Enjoy deciding who you want to be!

Do You Hang on to Guilt?

“Guilt is to the spirit what pain is to the body.”

We are told that guilt is a waste of time especially if it is about something that you have done from your everyday conditioned self. You haven’t intentionally gone out to hurt someone or make someone else feel bad, but you have behaved in a way that you feel bad about. “What possessed me? What came over me? What was I thinking?” The trouble is we have done something that didn’t require thinking, you may have responded to a situation in a way that you were taught or you picked up when younger, but now you realise isn’t actually the way you want to respond, so you feel the natural feeling of guilt. What possessed you was a conditioned behavioural response.

In fact those responses you have made, may actually be coming from the conditioned place but so also is our judgement of that response. What you have just said or done may not have done any harm to someone else or that person may have felt harm, because they are also coming from their conditioned being. It is a real web of beliefs and thoughts around those beliefs that cause us so much angst. Realising that feeling guilt doesn’t actually change anything in the other person or around the situation you have created, all it does, is affect your own physiology. The more stress we feel, the more cortisol that is being pumped out into our body. The more we can let go of the judgement & critical thoughts we direct to ourselves, the more likely we are to be releasing the feel good hormones such as oxytocin, serotonin and dopamine. We all have a choice, even though it may feel more difficult to stay in the less critical state at times.

Enjoy feeling the love of oxytocin and dopamine!