Monthly Archives: April 2018

Driving Around in Circles?

“The number one reason most people don’t get what they want is that they don’t know what they want. Clarity is power.”   T. Harv Eker

I have clients who come to see me who are at the crossroads in their life for very many reasons. One of the first things I do, is to get out the map or GPS and sort out where it is that they are going. Just like going for a trip in the car, if we don’t know where we are going, we are not going to be able to put the coordinates into the system. We could drive around in circles getting nowhere. We need to know where we are now and where it is that we are headed. Life is no different. A lot of women who no longer have children at home and who haven’t thought about what they want for a long time, have lost the ability to dream about their future. They can get frustrated when I ask them what is they would like, in say 12 months, and they have no idea.

Getting clear on that dream and the challenges they see that they may have to negotiate, are essential if they are going to get out of the driveway. Some people, as I say, have forgotten how to dream, because they haven’t had the necessary practice for a long time. Others weren’t encouraged as a child to do the dreaming that most of us do when we are little. The experts are now encouraging youngsters to tap into that part of them that has a knowing about the path to take. In my day, children who sang or danced in front of others was considered precocious. What if that is the core of who they are and they could be the next winner of New Zealand has talent? Many children are encouraged to go down a professional path by their professional family, but they really don’t want to. It is never too late to ‘jump ship,’ and follow the calling of your inner being. But being clear is the starting point.

Enjoy following your clear dream!

Are you Living Your Dreams our Your Fears?

“Too many of us are not living our dreams, because we are living our fears.”

My journey along this personal development started with a state of fear that for a long time wouldn’t let me go. This was mainly because I didn’t know how to. Dreams that my husband and I had been working towards together had all gone when he died. I had forgotten how to dream on my own and the fear had taken over and I didn’t know how to change the track on the record. I was told that nature abhors a vacuum, and if I let the fears go, I could attract more pleasant and positive things into my life. It took me a while to get that combination right for me. After 2 or 3 ‘failures,’ I found the love I have for coaching pop up, and the fear disappeared. I’m not saying the fear has gone for good and I’m not sure that’s a reality anyway. But rather than the fear being in control, I have taken that job back now.

We are all different and for some, this scary step of moving through the fear into the unknown may be more difficult than for others. We may have an awareness that it isn’t ok to fail so it takes more focus, courage, and determination to pursue the dreams we want.  For others who are blessed with more ‘get up and go,’ and belief in themselves, it may be easier and they may find it hard to understand what the fearful ones are going through. However you have probably heard that challenges make us stronger and we could learn more from the experiences that we have worked through. So give yourself some time each day to dream, this may help the steps we need to take to surface, and yes we may feel some fear but we will all feel so much better about ourselves if take the first step and then the next. Before you know it, you’ll be living at least part of your dream.

Enjoy moving towards your dream!

Opportunity can Knock at Any Time! Are You Ready?

“Even when opportunity knocks, a person still has to get up off their seat & open the door.”

It’s interesting that I should see this quote today. I have been following one of the online gurus for a while who has just put out a book called “Opportunity.” Apparently it is about how to find and create opportunities in your business and your life. After studying and interviewing hundreds of millionaire and billionaire leaders , his number one discovery was that They were better at finding and creating opportunity in their lives. They were also better choosing the best ones, then growing those opportunities to success.

Unfortunately we often have threats or challenges between us and the thing we want to achieve. We can all choose different ways to handle those challenges. As a coach one of my tasks is to help people find what their challenges are. Often they know that something is blocking them but we need to find what their beliefs, their thoughts or their self-image is all about before they can find the blocks, deal with them and move forward. We have all had different experiences as children and growing up, that have created beliefs about the world that are not a truth for other people who have had different experiences. Often it only takes a minor tweak to get these people seeing the opportunities and moving towards them with more confidence and trust in themselves.

Enjoy finding the opportunities and choosing the best ones!

What do I do Now?

“Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.”  Wayne Dyer

I often talk about the choices we have in life and here I’ve found another quote relating to the choices we all have in every minute of the day. Sometimes of course the old conditioned mind chips in and ruins the best of intentions. It chips in and tells us that things are not the way they’re supposed to be, it tells us we haven’t achieved what we should have and it tells us how bad we are feeling because someone said something that wasn’t how we wanted it. I’m pleased that I have the choice. I can continue to work on being a person I’m more proud of because I haven’t let those outside situations affect me so strongly.

We’re all a work in progress and we can choose in any given moment whether we want to be miserable about those events that weren’t perfect, or we can choose to believe we can change our perspective, we can see the story from another perspective, we can feel compassion for not only the other person who we have reacted to, but also for ourselves for the choices we have made. I am so pleased that we have this choice, we don’t have to accept everything that happens like a true victim. What if I was to believe that there is always two sides to look at things and I have the choice to find the other way, find a way of seeing the gift in the situation, see the learning that will make me stronger next time that situation arises.

Enjoy choosing life on a moment to moment basis!