Monthly Archives: April 2020

Are You a Pessimist or an Optimist?

There’s no difference between a pessimist who says, “Oh, it’s hopeless, so don’t bother doing anything,” and an optimist who says, “Don’t bother doing anything; it’s going to turn out fine anyway.” Either way, nothing happens. – Yvon Chouinard

When “The Secret” went viral there was a huge up-swell in the belief that all we had to do was ask for something, believe it would happen, and it would turn up on your doorstep. There was not enough emphasis about the action that we should take to move us in the right direction. Certainly every thought we have, has its own vibration that goes out into energy ‘soup’ that is around each and every one of us. Quantum physics has shown that the ‘energy field’ as it is called, is influenced by everything we think or believe. If you think about when someone you know isn’t feeling well, or when they’re excited about something, our energy interacts and you know it. Something in you is triggered or affected. You may go into a group of people and have unexplained feelings that something isn’t quite right. This is you responding to vibrations of other people around you – and if it doesn’t sound too woo woo – they don’t even have to be that close to you. We’ve all had those phone calls from someone we have just been thinking about.

So what has this got to do with pessimism and optimism? Everything! Those beliefs and feelings are constantly going out and influencing what is being attracted back to us. I’m sure you all know someone whose energy is very heavy, and they’re tiring to be around as they are constantly expecting the worst or awfulize every situation. If however you are around an optimist, their energy feels light enough and if they harness that positive energy they get lots done, what they want seems to come their way. However if an optimist doesn’t follow through on that belief that “it’s all going to turn out fine anyway,” the energy field will get mixed messages. Yes, all is OK but they’re not prepared to do their bit. Maybe it’s because they’ve been told by someone that it should be easy – they shouldn’t have to work as hard as they do. Maybe it’s something in their belief system that is getting in the way or stopping them from following through with some inspired action? Have you a sense of whether you are in either of these groups or are you an optimist who takes action?

Enjoy being an optimist taking inspired action!

Are the Cracks Beginning to Appear in Your Communication?

“Communication is critical to developing mutually beneficial and mutually enjoyable relationships.  Relationships require trust, and one of the best ways to develop trust is to focus on helping the other person feel heard and understood.”  Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup for the Soul series.

Communication has always been essential, but now more than ever, when we are cooped up with family members and everyone is getting on everyone else’s nerves. When that happens we can revert to behaviour that has been there forever that really doesn’t serve anyone. Maybe you’re the woman in the household, trying to do some work, be the teacher & keep the place running as usual. Maybe you’re the man of the household worrying about the financial situation because your hours have been cut or you have no work at all. Either way, this is a time of stress for most of us, and we may then take it out on the ones we love, with the words we use. In other words, how we communicate.

A couple of core limiting beliefs are that I’m not good enough, this maybe in some particular way, or that I’m not heard or understood. Where they came from, is immaterial at this point. They are there and creating barriers to having a loving, compassionate relationship with those we love. Jack Canfield talks about Trust in his quote. Trust is at the base of all good relationships. If we are stressed we struggle to access trust because the 2 of them live in different parts of the brain. Stress releases hormones that shut down the part of the brain where trust lives, and we have more difficulty relating and interacting with our family, friends and co-workers.  Because stress is also the culprit in so many of our health concerns, not the least our immunity, it is crucial that we learn how to ‘manage’ it. Uncertainty is very closely allied with stress, but don’t use that as an excuse. Most people are in the same situation. The media is reminding us all of how we can reduce our stress levels, and this may be the time to learn some new skills by following and practising what the various groups are offering on TV or our computers.

From this place you will find it easier to feel compassion and love for those around you who are also struggling. Where the trust lives is also some neurological cells that help the connection with others. It is also the area where the hugging hormone is released. This may then help you to ‘be present’ with those around you. This means listening with 100% attention. Maybe even have a conversation when things are a little ‘quieter’ to reach an agreement as a family that everyone is going to work on this. This listening skill is essential to make a good connection. So make it a goal to ask questions that encourage a conversation and actively listen to their reply – really listen, not waiting for your turn to jump in and say what you think. This will help your friends, colleagues and loved ones feel validated. Knowing that someone is listening to us in this way, helps to develop trust. What if this was something positive to come out of this imposed isolation for you and your family?

Enjoy helping others feel heard and understood!

Does This Period in History Feel Like the Resurrection to You?

“You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”  Christopher Robin from “Winnie the Pooh.”

I didn’t remember this quote even though I loved the Pooh Bear stories. I think I love the Pooh Bear stories even more now as an adult than I did as a child.  I think the humour was often lost on me as a child.  Poor old Pooh his emotional self-worth didn’t seem that wonderful & I’m sure he was a binge eater, don’t you agree? How many of you are feeling that this enforced jail sentence is playing havoc with your mental and emotional state. I’m finding that I’m doing a lot more reminiscing than I usually do. Yesterday while in the garden I made a connection with the resurrection of the Sunday of Easter and the resurrection that we are hopefully going to be seeing off the back of this strange time in history. My garden will certainly have a look of something new, after me spending so much time out there. I usually like walking along the beach and grounding myself that way. Instead my garden now looks loved and I’m not ashamed of how it is looking. Shame is a very low vibration. There are other emotions that also keep us down which the mainstream medics are now acknowledging lowers our immunity.

So what are you managing to find time for that will keep your energetic vibration high – we know when that is, because we feel good? Are you aware of feeling good when you have listened to the wisdom from within rather than giving that power away to others and doing whatever it is that they say?  It is our conditioned mind that might say, “Oh bear of little brain.”  For all his faults I think Pooh would have been a good coach.  He was human after all, he listened to what Christopher Robin asked and considered the questions to help Christopher Robin come up with the answers himself rather than relying on Pooh to have the answers.  We all have the answers within us, if we sit with the question longer enough.  That’s what Einstein said was the reason for his success – he sat with the problems for longer than most of us and believed that the universe would give him the answers. Like all of us, our potential is infinite, so hold on to that while feeling the situation around you is feeling upside down. Believe that this time is teaching you something about yourself that you hadn’t known before.

Enjoy waiting for the answers that will make you smarter than you think!

“There is No Substitute For Persistence” Napoleon Hill

“Obstacles will not defeat me.  Even the most difficult of situations will yield to my resolve, persistence & determination.”  Leonardo da Vinci

At the beginning of last century Napoleon Hill wrote the ground breaking book, “Think and Grow Rich.” He said in the very first paragraph of the book, “Truly, ‘thoughts are things’, and powerful things at that, when mixed with purpose, persistence and a burning desire for their translation into riches or other material objects.” These words are still true today. Today when the world needs us to be passionate about our collective purpose – not just our own materialistic ideas. Today when we understand so much more about the energetic fields around us from the science of quantum physics. Today when we need to be persistent and not give up on the common good for mankind and the generations who are coming behind us.

Anyone who is ‘successful’ in some way, will tell you they have had to overcome some sort of challenge or obstacles along the path & often many times over.  If you think about learning to walk.  If we have normal physical anatomy, we would never have considered giving up on the idea of walking, we had to be persistent & overcome some knocks before we became proficient.  There would not have been any question about achieving that milestone. We all have it in us to believe in the future and work towards bettering ourselves, bettering circumstances for others aspiring to lofty universal ideals.

Think back to some time in your past when you have been tested & when you have come out the other end, you realize that your character has grown, leading to a strength you may not have recognized previously. From this growth, comes a confidence and optimism that your future could be all you think, as long as you are persistent and consistent. Think of a time when you have successfully overcome an obstacle because you have stuck with it, you may have had to reframe, refocus and redirect .  Realize that in those instances you were a victor & not a victim!  Make a resolve that you will use those inbuilt strengths to persist & surmount this new challenge yet again.

Enjoy being victorious!